By: Shae Reid
It’s such a taboo topic to discuss, sex. Such a natural occurrence, yet when we speak of sex, it makes us feel as though we’re being “dirty”. We understand the nature of sex, the reasons we do it, and the necessity; but what about the role of sex in a relationship? Does sex help our relationship more than we think? Everyone has a different relationship with their own partner. I can say from experience working with couples that no two relationships are the same. Each relationship needs many things; love, honest communication, trust, loyalty, friendship, fun, and the list could go on! But what many people don’t think about, is that relationships need intimacy and sex to survive.
Intimacy - close familiarity or friendship; closeness. Intimate relationship - An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical or emotional intimacy. Physical intimacy is characterized by friendship, platonic love, romantic love or sexual activity. In the “new relationship” phase, which is usually about two years in, intimacy isn’t usually a problem. But after that, we tend to become more comfortable, busier living life, working, etc., so we forget about the intimacy part of the relationship. We may not think about it, but intimacy takes work! Sometimes we’re too tired, too busy, too irritated, too stressed to think about sex and intimacy, and that’s where things begin to fall apart.
Each individual in the relationship should make it a priority each day to incorporate some sort of intimate act between the two. It can be something as simple as a little makeout session just before bed, cooking dinner together and simple catching up on each other’s lives, a few minutes of cuddle time before sleep or upon waking. Though the relationship does need sex, and sexual intimacy does help a relationship to stay strong, being intimate does not always mean having sex.